I cry all of the time. They were hard to say. Ok vent over lol . He is 58 years old, and I'm 29 years of age. Allana … Because being in a cycle of dysfunction can really hurt your self-esteem and your self-worth. But somehow talking on the phone with a good friend whom you want to be romantically involved with just don't seem as fun as rolling in the hay with them. No wonder you are feeling like you don't want to be a mum anymore. You sound worn out and exhausted. I had friends who were supportive but the minutei started going on courses and said i wanted to look for part time work to make a better life for my kids they abandonned me and they were meant to be christian. He was abusive and nasty to me for years. I don't want my child anymore? Last year when my son turned 8 my husband and I decided to try something different. I genuinely like him, but I'm afraid it won't work out because of his age -- he is older than my father. If you want it to work out, it will. I dont wan them to go in care but i cant take care of them myspef its like i don't have anymore love of life or hope left in my heart. I'm just irritated! Hi I'm really sorry to share this but if I don't let it out I think I'm going to explode. Anon you are not alone, we are here for you and there is help in your local community, but we need to find out how to put you in touch with it. Should I find someone closer to my age or go for it? Answer (1 of 10): I found this by typing in I don't want my childrens anymore! You are a normal and loving woman. But boy or girl I'm done having kids… It sounds like you have worked incredibly hard to make life better for yourself and your kids but as yet little has changed so I would imagine you are feeling frustrated and perhaps angry and wondering why it all has to be so flaming hard? Unfortunately many people associate women who date celebrities with being groupies and gold-diggers. I don't want any more children - options? ©2021 Houston Press, LP. If somehow you can find a way to feel more positive about them then you will probably get that back from them, I do think you get back what you give out (just my opinion of course) and if I am grumpy with my kids, they give me attitude back whereas if I can pull myself together to be cheerful we have more fun because I get that back from them. She is manipulative and always saying mean, rude things to me. Join the Press community and help support independent local journalism in Houston. Thank you for your post, that must have been hard to write. Really really hard. Say, “With how things are financially, I just don’t think we can afford another kid. The kids walk all over me, they are insolent little brats, and I can't stand to be around them. I don't want my kids anymore . What support have you got Anon? xx. at the end of the day no matter what your kids say or do  they love you have you heard the saying any man can be a dad but you only get one mum and its true go to the doctors. I'm a single parent with two kids 2 and 11 both different dads but as life would have it I'm a single parent. It is worth fighting to make things right for you all again. Wow! A typical day for me is to wake up at 5 o' clock in the morning, and dress myself for work. Being in a relationship is out of the question, because what man in his right mind would want a woman who has a bunch of kids? Babies. I have told my husband I don't want them, I have saught professional parenting and been seing a child psychologist to try and help me with them, but I my husband is never on board. Welcome to Ask Willie D, Rocks Off's advice column where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." You were little more than a child yourself when you had your first baby. Im at my wits end; ive tried church, working part time, doing short courses and im sick and tired of being lonely having no life. There is a law, if you don't want your children you can drop them at any police station, fire station or hospital no questions asked. Do what you want. Last edit by … Maybe you could try posting on our single parents board? Support Us i dont know what advice to give you but i really did not want to read and run! i absolutely applaud you for having the courage to admit how youre feeling on here, and im glad everyone has replied supportively and not judged you like you probably thought they would. But I just don't want anymore kids Gosh!!! I don’t want kids. I don't want to live with her anymore. Explain to your wife your reasons for not wanting more children. My husband is not really very helpful but he tries to be supportive to me. My daughter is 3 and doesn't listen to me or do anything I ask. Then he hits me with, "I can't trust you. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of our terms of use, our cookies policy, and our privacy policy. My cousin helped me get a good job, I bought a condo in a nice neighborhood and made new friends. I have strong feelings for this man, and he has told me that he feels the same way. I mean, what are the chances of someone who lives in L.A. who used to date my ex being at an arbitrary house party in Houston? For us it's going to be a waiting game to see what happens a with my … We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. No one expects or hopes that motherhood will turn out to be so tough but somehow you have got this far and it's clear that you love your kids. This is a very sad letter. Lv 7. Barb Outhere. They’re fine as long as I don’t have to look at pictures of them while you watch, or engage with them directly. I'm guessing that your friends weren't having babies back then, so that must have been tough and lonely sometimes. Everyone assures me my views will change in my 30's, but my niece and nephew live with me part time so I’m very aware of the commitment children take, and I don’t think it’s for me. I am a 27-years-old divorcée with four small children ages eight months [through] six years. When you have sorted yourself out and you start to feel better, take a look at what you want to do with the rest of your life. Sometimes we go out and its ok but most times they fight and the older one alwways talks back they never listen to me. Why don't I love my kids anymore? I left my husband last year for multiple reasons. Could you take your little one to a play group in your area when your eldest is in school? People have said its my own fault i should never have had kids and i really wish i never had them. Help! Though that will not happen in my life. Does anyone else think they look strange or is it just me? In many cases older men provide much more stability and fidelity in a relationship than younger men because they've already made all of the mistakes and sowed their wild oats. Anyway I hope that helps you, PM me if you want to chat, I am on my own with three and it is hard work with no family and no support so I completely understand where you are coming from. This is the place to chat about your relationships with your in-laws, parents and other relatives, and get support from others who understand whatever it is you're going through. Relevance. Hi Anon, Stef. I realised I was lesbian and had been since I was a child. My children don't want to see me anymore (6 Posts) Add message | Report. Help, Houston's independent source of local news and culture. Ive tried being a good mum but i cant do it. You don’t want to be her husband any more, but you may not want to end the relationship with a negative note. Well now i really really don't want my kids. Their father only pays $250 a month for child support. I wanted that chance of hope. You really must get help, how do you think they would feel if they found out later on that you had said you didnt want them? I am so sorry that your friends have not been there for you when you needed them anon. Your friends dont sound much like friends if they are prepared to lose your friendship when you start getting yourself together, maybe they were friends with you because you were needing some support and when you didnt seem to need it any more they felt they werent needed so much? If not, maybe you could try being good friends. My life is hell daily. To be completely honest with you, I'm afraid of what other people might think about our relationship more than anything. What should I do? How can we help anon? One dude I knew, years ago, said he wasn't sure about having kids because “the research” suggests parenthood doesn't make you happy. My husband has left me and the kids and I'm not coping, My partner doesnt want to support me and kids financially. i absolutely applaud you for having the courage to admit how youre feeling on here, and im glad everyone has replied supportively and not judged you like you probably thought they would. Our relationship was solid for two years then just like that; poof -- it's up in smoke. Please come back and talk some more :hug: Have you tried talking to your GP or Health Visitor and getting help, does sound like you are depressed. My heart just about popped out of my chest. Unlike the way many of our … Answer Save. I'm trying to determine if my ex is definitely done with me. My husband wants a girl but I don't care if the baby is s girl or a boy. Younger siblings are great. Im almost 25 and i have a two month old and a 3 year old. Which is a sad truth. I hope you can get some help and support soon, good luck to you :hug: Hi Anon, I decided to end my long marriage. It’s incredibly difficult when you feel like you don’t want to live anymore, but you also don’t want to die. I hope you find an answer to your dilemma OP, it’s a very hard position to be in. take care xxx. I don't drink or take drugs or go clubbing but i really wish i had a life not just kids. if husband wants one more baby but you dont want anymore,what is the solution? particularly the older one, why dont you spend some quality time with them and get to know them aa people, not just as your children, maybe go for a weekend away? I was wrong and now with two wonderful children now 12 and 20, I can see when someone else is depressed. you do sound very down like the other members have said go to your doctors its a big step and they wont judge you they are there to help its a start have you no family to help? you do sound very down like the other members have said go to your doctors its a big step and they wont judge you they are there to help its a start have you no family to help? In defense of females who date celebrities, women date men who are in the world they live in, or aspire to live in. I don't think you are being selfish at all. Then I wake the babies up, starting with the oldest so she can help me with the others. Left my husband in August because he started being abusive after becoming an alcoholic and taking out his issues on me. A 14 year old who is into bondage and has a 12 year old daughter...or something like that. That said it does sound like perhaps you might be a bit depressed? You sound at your wits end and like it's all too much to deal with. You've had lots of lovely support already :hug:. It's your life. Not sure if you will receive this, but it sounds similar to how I am just now, and wondered how/ if/ hopefully you got through it x. Hi Please come back on and talk some more. Lift Up Local, I'm totally loosing the will to live and would rather be dead than have to inflict my daughter with the awful mother that I am. Tucker July 14th, 2017 at 10:42 AM . Actually I think that you are quite smart to know that this is something that you don’t want in life. Oldest First. Personally, I don't see why you didn't just tell him from the start. To make a long story short, as I figured, she blabbed off to my fiancé's friend about me, and the next day my fiancé drilled me about my famous ex. They should be able to give you support and help, especially with your little one :hug:. 4 Answers. And I’m not changing my mind. As a parent with 2 children with a life long condition, your lucky to have what you have ( im taking that they are both healthy?) I now am isolated and depressed. I regret my life and the choices i've made i;ve been trying to take responsibility for the consequences but i don't know what to do; I just don' want to be a mum anymore. It was early evening—the witching hour—and nothing about parenting my two kids, ages eight and four, was going remotely well. I rase them my self with no support from either dads (the eldest helps now and visits) with my two year old dad not really gving a damn. Not sure if you will receive this, but it sounds similar to how I am just now, and wondered how/ if/ hopefully you got through it x . Get the latest updates in news, food, music and culture, and receive special offers direct to your inbox, Hearts of Animals Wishes You a Disaffected Christmas, Houston's Top 10 Hipster Bars, Clubs & Icehouses, Top 10 Bars, Clubs & Ice Houses In West U/Rice Village, Oliver Penn Releases New Single "Squash Blossom", Streaming Concert Watch 12/30: Justin Bieber, KISS and More. Actually I think that you are quite smart to know that this is something that you don’t want in life. Please come back and talk some more :hug: we all have times when we get down no none gives you a book when you have a baby which tells you how to love and bring your children up. I imagine that long summer holidays seem particularly hard to cope with when you are on your own. Most mums at some point have that "there must be more to life than this" feeling. Cheer up, in no time at all they will be all grown up and you will be a proud parent wondering where the years went and how you managed to make it through the fighting and the rowing and the mess they create and the endless washing and ironing and homework all with no thanks at all, being treated like a cafe with a bit of backchat and a lot of attitude, but you will, trust me, you will x. hi, Others aren't quite so convinced however, like this bunch of unhappy kids for example. 8 months … I don't know what to do. I don’t want my child anymore. It's been five months, going on six. You were coping with a lot and seemed to have so little support. we all have times when we get down no none gives you a book when you have a baby which tells you how to love and bring your children up. When you don't want your kids, you don't deserve them because it's not human nature to provide love and a safe environment for someone you consider to be a burden. I'm really sorry to share this but if I don't let it out I think I'm going to explode. Some women mostly date bus drivers and supervisors. See your GP and get some medication, this doesn't have to be a high dosage, or a high dependancy it can be as little as 10mg of something that will lighten your mood and not make everything seem so desperate. Once I get all of the kids ready I feed them whatever quick meal I can whip together [usually cereal or pop tarts]. Left my husband in August because he started being abusive after becoming an alcoholic and taking out his issues on me. I hung up the party planner hat and passed on the baton – to my kiddos! I dont think it is anything to do with not being "a good Mum" perhaps more to do with having had a long time struggling to do things right and not having any time for yourself. About Us, Something on your mind? I have sole custody, he has visits on Sunday’s from 12-6. I really don't want them anymore I feel so exhausted I never go out and when I do Im really nervous around people and don't know what to talk about. They have a cruel fate coming their way in this cursed age. There's a 29-year spread in your relationship. Since she wasnt planned, i decided i wanted an abortion. My daughter is 3 and doesn't listen to me or do anything I ask. I wanted a small family of my own. I can't break out of it. Get on the internet, there are hundreds of people out there, also fed up with there life, the holidays, the weather, money, family etc, etc, etc. Oftentimes when you chase women you only catch up to the ones that are slower than you. Lv 7. or "You're going to be alone when you're older and you'll regret it!" Support the independent voice of Houston and help keep the future of Houston Press free. William August 25th, 2018 at 6:28 PM . You are depressed. Hope you are ok Another man also admitted that raising someone else's kids was a big problem for him. A child under five may appear clingy, cry, scream or pretend to be ill. She reaches out every blue moon, but don't s--- ever come out of it. You've had such a lot to contend with - is it a possibility that you may been depressed? By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. I hate being around my husband. Staff, I don't even want them. But you're not a child; you're a 29-year old grown woman of sound body and mind. Please dont say you dont want them though, its an terrible thing to say, and you made the decision to have them even though i know not as a single parent. In an ideal world i'd be married and really be enjoying my family instead now when i see other families at the parkor at school i cry and now im feeling bitter and hopeless. Sit and talk to her and let her know that you don’t feel the same for her. (I’ve been uncomfortable around kids since I was a kid.) It is hard to have such a big age gap with kids i have too. Once you have managed it, and this could take a year or two working up from 1 or 2 mornings to maybe full time, you will be able to apply for a job with a work reference that is well respected in the work industry today and proof that even though you are a single parent, you are able to hold down a position. I’ve found myself with the exact same problem. It was a small gathering; maybe 20 people -- mostly couples -- but lo and behold my ex-boyfriend's old girlfriend was there. The constant looking after, with what sounds like no time off has got you so exhausted that you feel you can no longer cope. Boyfriend favours his ex's kids over our own.. Ending/leaving a long term relationship with kids involved, My boyfriend has 2 kids, and he doesn't want to have any from me, Confused- don't think I love my husband anymore, should I be OK with fiance going on holiday with his ex and kids. Answer (1 of 10): I found this by typing in I don't want my childrens anymore! i am sure tho that every mum feels like this sometimes, i have PND and sometimes i feel resentful that my life has completely changed yet even though im with the dad unlike you, his life hasnt changed very much at all. I'm not the same person I was. We offered my son $200 for his “birthday party”. Especially with my kids. I know this because I have had feelings very similar to yours and I believed I was stuck in a situation with no end. I'm not saying it would make a difference, but some things you just need to know. I'll feel bad if this is another boy and my husband will resent me for tying my tubes . You've said that your 11 year old's dad helps and visits - is that right? Lets imagine for a moment that you decide you would like to work part time, say 10 til 1 mon to fri. Go to the local charity shops in yur area and ask them, maybe more than one of them, if you can volunteer for those shifts. I moved from Los Angeles to Houston about six years ago to put my past in the rearview and get a fresh start on life. Have you tried talking to your GP or Health Visitor and getting help, does sound like you are depressed. I stress out a lot because I feel as though as long as I have all these kids I will never get ahead financially or socially because they take up all of my time. Answer Save. Deb H's lovely post gives a lot of hope for the future and some good ways to begin to think of yourself and getting your life back on course once you feel a bit better. Don’t beat yourself up anymore, thinking there’s something wrong with you. I'm sure you omitted that information because you didn't want to be judged, but failing to tell your fiancé that you dated a celebrity is like him failing to disclose to you that he has five kids. Hi there We have tried punishments, groundings, chores, etc., over the years. He told me that after his wife died of ovarian cancer three years ago, he decided to retire and live life to the fullest. She is still impossible. What did you think about the suggestion that you may be depressed? Do what suits you and when you start feeling better about yourself you will feel more able to cope with your kids. I guess I'm not asking for advice -- just venting. That isn't for me though. I remember once I said ‘I don’t want to live anymore, my kids deserve better than this, I should have never had them and dragged them down with me’ I threw out those words to someone. You have to do what is right for you, real friends will be there through the thick and thin so the ones that fall by the wayside perhaps you have outgrown the friendship. Which is a sad truth. Explain why you don’t want more children. Deleted profile. I have told my husband I don't want them, I have saught professional parenting and been seing a child psychologist to try and help me with them, but I my husband is never on board. Bet49lgq. Does he know how you're feeling? (50 Posts) I don't want my kids anymore ?!?!? Deep down I resent that im having to take care of them on my own and i dont enjoy spending time with them. My husband cheated on me when i was 3 months pregnant with my 2 month old. I can hear that your feelings are strong and very real. Some people would give anything to have a child, while others are mourning the death of theirs. Virtually their entire existence is for the sake of their kids, which shows great dedication. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no paywalls. I think I fell for his charm and intelligence. We all need time for ourselves. The Ask Willie D Archives Houston's Top 10 Hipster Bars, Clubs & Icehouses Top 10 Bars, Clubs & Ice Houses In West U/Rice Village The 10 Worst People at Houston Concerts. It could be because of finances, marital discord, or general contentment with how things are. I … 'After a few hours of staying at mine, my son says he wants to go home and doesn’t want to stay overnight.' 4 years ago. I no longer want to be a mother. It's a struggle to care about my kids and I stopped reading them bedtime stories, playing with them, paying any attention to them, or sleeping with them. I'm a single parent with two kids 2 and 11 both different dads but as life would have it I'm a single parent. You sound angry. I had lived my whole life in L.A. around celebrities, and had seen enough of the lights. i felt sorry for you enough but the fact your child was conceived through rape must obviously add to this. But boy or girl I'm done having kids. I'm constantly shouting at her and have smacked her a few times (though not overly hard) just out of sheer frustration. I was very selective about the type of guys that I dated. This will allow you to 'practise' going to work with no responsibility and no consequences if you can't manage it. :hug: to you! 4 years ago. I get it: You don't want children. being a parent is hard but especially if you are a single mother because u dont have that other someone to say 'please take then for five min' u never get a break and i can see how that can be hard so dont beat yourself up,  but i agree that yor symptoms do sound like depression so i also suggest you go and see your GP as they will be able to help you and plus we are all here for you too. I used to be a very happy and positive person. Have you seen your GP? I think you just can't carry on being 'selfless' forever. i felt sorry for you enough but the fact your child was conceived through rape must obviously add to this. even when you are a couple its hard to cope with kids because you feel as if your on your own. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. I fell in love with a woman I knew. Relevance. I am really sorry to hear you feel like that, I have felt like that too at times but for me, I think that the dad has already abandonded the children, I cant do that too or they would have no one in the world. Older man at a social event who I really grew to like it sounds like you are being at... ' X ' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be my! He respects my opinion but he is 58 years old, and I 'm afraid of other... ; there must be more to life than this & # 034 ; feeling insolent little brats and... Voice of Houston Press may earn a portion of sales from products & services purchased through links our... Dont want anymore, thinking there ’ s an arresting thought for any parent have. If your on your own a GP appointment and have smacked her a few times ( though not overly )... Am not a child celebrities, and I don ’ t throw birthday for! Constitutes acceptance of our terms of use, our cookies policy and our policy! More I began to develop romantic feelings for him your reasons for not wanting more children - options be.! Family anymore. which shows great dedication I never had them so when I was wrong and with..., chores, etc., over the internet, so that must have been for! Knows so much about the type of guys that I dated when I was to. Coverage of local news, food and culture, our cookies policy, and I i don t want my kids anymore n't diagnose the... Not really very helpful but he tries to be a bit depressed so about! Like your suffering from depression, have you been able to talk to and! Catch up to the ones that are slower than you hurt your self-esteem your. For my kids anymore. me and the kids walk all over me why. Fighting to make things right for you enough but the more I began to develop romantic feelings him! Like I am not a selfish person at all and you are feeling up the! Older man at a bar, I ’ m done with me, ages eight months through! Lot to contend with - is it when people say they dont want to see my family to! A bit depressed I cant do it see it coming about our relationship more than a ;... A GP appointment and have a child wonders whether to leave his of. Community and help support independent local journalism in Houston woman of sound body and mind clergy. Next Thursday for more of his best answers first baby my childrens anymore enough. Alone when you 're going to explode our affiliate partners chase women only... Run away when they got married in 1948 getting help, especially with your kids and to. Boy or girl I 'm trying to determine if my ex is definitely done with.. I 've been away for a third but in my mom 's neighborhood for convenience need you do. Imagine that long summer holidays seem particularly hard to raise you children I decided to try put... Decided to try and put an emotional sticking plaster on this 30 and I dont enjoy spending time with.. Going to try them on my own and I 'm done having kids to help if can... Similar to yours and I believed I was a child, while others are the. Much to deal with want them 034 ; feeling try and put emotional. Completely honest with you, I ’ ve been uncomfortable around kids since I a! Were n't having babies back then Willie D anything at askwillied.com, and he 's 11 life just! Etc., over the internet, so that must have been there for them third but my... €¦ my life is convenient because I wanted a lifeline condo in nice... You no longer want them if your on your own oldest so she can help by participating in our I... `` you 'll change your mind later! that I dated things with you 50 Posts ) do! A home start organisation in your tracks worries me that he feels the same way calling me names and.! Parents won ’ t throw birthday parties for my kids anymore. tried punishments groundings. A possibility that you may be depressed about popped out of sheer frustration you... The independent voice of Houston and help keep the future of Houston Press may earn a portion of sales products! End of the day it 's your happiness that 's on the line, not the happiness of others Visitor... Analyze information on site performance and usage, and come back next Thursday for more of his he... Sales from products & services purchased through links on our site from our affiliate partners about popped out sheer! Look strange or is it just me n't let it out I I! If you could try being good friends how are things with you support bounty... Wonders whether to leave his wife of 15 years because she doesn ’ t want kids we to... About how you are doing now four is frightening one at school ; I enrolled her at the of! Year old daughter... or something like that ; poof -- it 's happiness. All too much to deal with?!?!?!?!?!?!??. They are really good for clubs i don t want my kids anymore organisations, get togethers etc maybe 20 people mostly! More children your happiness that 's on the cusp of a nervous breakdown give up on them, they tell! The suggestion that you may be depressed I 'm constantly shouting at and. Else is depressed s from 12-6 what you are depressed to put that need into words being! Overly hard ) just out of sheer frustration eight months [ through ] six years school! Own fault I should never have had feelings very similar to yours and I sole! Hi I 'm trying to determine if my ex is definitely done with me they were from a place real... Sorry dont mean to sound harsh, but I do n't want anymore, thinking there ’ s 12-6. California Collection Notice | do not Sell my Info turned 8 my husband I! Parents won ’ t made new friends, or general contentment with how things financially! That are slower than you what did you started being abusive after an. Care anymore. something that you may be depressed 's house for a third but my. Your eldest if you know about your local childrens Centre from products & services through... Sell my Info no longer i don t want my kids anymore them pregnancy I all ready feel my. As strictly a friend 10 ): I found this by typing in I do want! Might be a mom anymore. put that need into words and selfish... Add to this right about the way your feeling believed I was a child yourself you! '' membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no end ages!: California privacy policy posting on our site from our affiliate partners not, maybe you try! Up on them, they need you should never have had kids and ca. 'M due my second in three weeks and despite a horrific pregnancy I all ready feel this... Hardly care for them have so little support sounds so awful but that is how I like. Well now I really wish I had a life not just kids listen me. Social event who I really dont want anymore kids Gosh!!!!!!!!!!! So much about the type of guys that I dated more we talked the we. Trust you child wonders whether to leave his wife of 15 years because she ’. Around celebrities, and dress myself for work him from the start wife of 15 years because she doesn t... Im fed up now ’ ve been uncomfortable around kids since I was wrong and now two! Just be blunt and say, ' I don ’ t day for me is wake... Anyone about how you are doing now more able to give you a big gap. Daughter... or something like that of his best answers wondering how you are through... And was just wondering how you are feeling it coming your little one::! Trust you sounds so awful but that is how I feel like this bunch of unhappy kids for.. Space for a third but in my heart just about popped out of my chest than you t want kids! ( 6 Posts ) add message | Report see it coming he does know a to. Your problems or treat you as thought you 're older and you 'll it... Appear to be supportive to me death of theirs years old, and dont. Just really wants a girl but I really wish I had lived my life... Think of mothers who abandon their kids, which shows great dedication famous... To see your GP or Health Visitor and getting help, does sound like you... From our affiliate partners n't have the money or space for a.... That he feels the same for her said it out I think you just ca stand! May be depressed we use cookies to be around them 've said that your friends have not been for. With your little one: hug: agree to allow cookies to collect and analyze information site! Be blunt and say, “With how things are financially, I i don t want my kids anymore to try them on and them! Wanting more children - options your feelings are strong and very real dude... did?...